Doctor Who?

So just last week, I mentioned that the Dr. Who tchatchkes that were pinned everywhere (and I do mean EVERYwhere) on Pinterest had piqued my interest.  I count myself a sci-fi nerd and I'm a sucker for all things Brit but I had yet to see a second of this long-running BBC (according to everyone I've spoken to) "masterpiece." Now that that's changed,  I wouldn't call it fantastic (Firefly is Fantastic just for comparison), it's got kind of a "need to watch to somehow figure it all out" quality about it.

 Seeing that its long-awaited return is this Saturday, BBC America has practically been playing repeats on a constant loop, which has given me the chance to sample any time I want.  Luckily, the episodes I've gotten to see star the 10th Doctor otherwise known to us mortals (I'm noticing that hard core Whovians treat him as a god among men) as David Tennant.  I must agree with the fan-base on this guy.  He's fantastic!  He's a Brit who seems to be having a blast playing the role and he's fairly adorable: How could I not enjoy?!. 

However, there are still things that completely baffle and confound me which are keeping me from drinking the kool-aid.  I realize this show has been on for decades and I really should have started from the beginning but I have a good excuse... I wasn't born yet. So if these things were explained a few decades ago, forgive me.

1. Why is the police box called a Tardis?  It's super cute in a vintage-y kind of way but what the heck does "tardis" mean? 

2. The CGI is unbelievably unbelievable.  I realize the BBC's budget isn't as large as say Warner Brothers but really?  The aliens are kinda corney.

3. The whole companion thing: Girlfriend or just friends? Really very confusing...

4.  This hasn't come up in the Tennant years but I'm hearing alot about Rivers and Ponds and goofy R2D2 looking things called Daleks...Any ideas?

5.  What the heck is up with the glowy magic wand thingy that apparently fixes everything?

6. And the 2 heart thing.  Why?

7. Lastly, I'm fairly certain that if Doctor House was played by a different actor every few seasons, fans would riot.  How has this worked for decades?  I sorta get the whole regenerating thing but it sounds like everyone has their own "Doctor".  Why keep watching a show that you know will never be as good as it was?

Of course, it's also got some things going for it.  It's not super sci-fi-ish. (I hate super sci-fi!)  It's not gory or gross or terrifying a la Criminal Minds (which I realize is not Sci-fi but it's just creepy!)  And of course, it has the stupid British humor that I find so endearing and so incredibly amusing.  So while I'm not ready to call myself a true Whovian, I will probably watch it until 10 regenerates to 11 at least (forgive me but I just don't see the appeal of #11) as I'm doing right now (apparently there are cybermen to defeat!).

Any-Who, Allonsy! (heh, see what I did there? : )